The Fun Is Over

After 3 months of the best living I have ever done since I can remember, it is almost time for the credits to start rolling. That's right ladies and gentle-theys, I am returning to the land of employment. I hate the fuck out of every single minute of it. Don't get me wrong, I am completely thankful that I have connections that will get me back on my feet financially and it is an entry into the medical field which is exactly what I have been needing and wanting now that I actually have a vision for the career path I want to pursue... 

But (and there will always be a but), we all know what comes with full time work. After so many months of not having to think or concern myself in that headspace, I am absolutely dreading going back. I wish I could have eased my way back with a remote gig like I was fighting for or even getting something cute and remote while I kept bringing in the DOL checks. Everybody being so damn stingy or taking so fucking long!!! How are you urgently hiring but getting back to people months later? 

This shit is all a sham, a fabrication, a facade, a role that I have to play. I don't have the capacity for it man. Just send me a laptop and a head device and let me be in my hot ass apartment and send me a check every couple weeks. Getting up every single morning to get ready to either sit at a desk and twiddle my thumbs or be overworked and hold 30 different titles for one measly check is NOT IT! I have had to play this song and dance for so long, if I actually put every single job I've had on a resume it would probably get to about 5 pages by now and I have been in the job market for 15 years. As we continue to "grind" in a decaying economy, I can't help but wonder ... what the fuck is the point? Are we supposed to just continue participating and then adapt to whatever comes if it ever does? I guess that would make the most sense. 

I'm just exhausted and I know y'all are too. I think collectively we are holding our breath for the next chapter because we all are very aware of how unsustainable of the unsustainability of this reality. Even those clinging to the last bits of power know that it is over. That's why they are trying to cling so hard to the intangible and try to revert us back to the "good ole days".  

I am going to focus on the fact that the work I am going to do from here and going forward will actually be meaningful and towards a goal that I see for myself that will  be for a greater good. That is all anyone can really ask for in this life, right? 

Whoopee! I guess

- Thing 1